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Non "animal people" will never understand....

Mantha Meow

Savannah Super Cat
There are only two people in my life that I can comfortably talk to about my cats that don't make me feel like a freak for having such a heart for animals. My boyfriend and my Nana. My dad and his fiance just put my dads house on the market. Every time it is shown I have to put the kitties in their carriers. I am young (21) so maybe I'm the one in the wrong here, but I think it's silly. They are already confined to my room 24/7 and now are locked in their carriers at random times. My cats are just going to hide under the bed if someone they don't know is in my room without me there. This morning I left my college class early to go put them in and was told my Aunt would be by right after the showings and let them out. So I am thinking 30-45 mins maybe an hour tops ok. I hadn't heard from her so I call and she hasn't gone by.. It's been almost 3 hours now. Anytime I make a big deal about this issue my family is quick to say "they're cats, they will be fine". Are they going to perish from spending a few hours in there? Well of course not. BUT they are going to be scared and mad and upset. NO ONE animal or human would be happy about being locked inside a cage that you cant even stretch out in without food/water or restroom. I get so upset when I am told "they are just cats". Exactly they are cats, living, feeling, emotional, intellectual creatures with feelings just like us. Maybe I am just the "crazy cat lady" that everyone seems to joke that I am. So what. I'd rather be a crazy cat lady than someone that doesn't understand the joy that owning a cat can bring.

I needed to vent and this felt like a safe place to do it. Being on this forum has been such a blessing to me. I love reading about others kitties and opinions and experiences. I don't even have a SV (YET!) and you all have welcomed me with open arms and plenty of advice. Feel free to tell me that I am being ridiculous in this situation or if you agree with me let me know that too! I would love to hear of other experiences where ya'll have felt like people just don't understand!!
(p.s I say animal people rather than cat people because I truly believe we are all animal lovers in general)
 

Pam Flachs

Savannah Super Cat
Is there any way you can buy or borrow a large dog cage to contain your cats while the house is being shown? One that is large enough for a litter box, food and water dishes and a hammock would be better than being locked into small carriers without those amenities, especially if you don't know how long the containment time might be and you are away from home or at school and worried....I know that house showing appointments are not always on time or are rescheduled. Having them stay in a larger crate or cage may help ease your worries. Covering the cage with a light blanket or sheet may help the kitties if they are shy around strangers....

You are not being ridiculous at all! I'm glad you can vent and share here your worries and concerns :)
 
D

Dantes

Guest
I had/have a similar family problem when I was in my 20s. My mother told me I couldn't bring my cat "home" for the holidays. Our relationship was never the same because when I got there I discovered she had invited my cousin to bring his big dog. Don't get me wrong, I love dogs and even wish I could have one, but the hypocrisy drove me right over the edge....

Doubly so when I told my mom I had bought my Ragdoll Dante from a breeder. Immediately it was "Why did you spend money to buy a cat? Why not get one free* from the shelter?" * shelter cats are never free, but I suppose she doesn't realize this never having adopted a "free" shelter dog herself. She has always had pedigreed dogs. When she met Duma for the first time I brushed her off on "how much he cost" because it's none of her damn business. Notice I don't mention my father because he's much worse than her when it comes to prejudice. He doesn't even consider a cat a valid pet.

Some people are just plain ignorant. Unfortunately if you're living under someone else's roof you have to play by their rules. But when they are under your roof they have to play by yours ;)

Ironically I read the following article this morning (click the link to get the full article): http://healthypets.mercola.com/sites/healthypets/archive/2014/02/05/cat-human-relationship.aspx

Why Your Cat May Be More Human Than You Think

Researchers concluded cats do indeed attach to humans – especially women – as social partners, and not just because they want to keep their food bowls full.

According to a co-author of the 2011 study, researcher Jon Day of the Waltham Centre for Pet Nutrition, in an interview with Discovery News:

"Food is often used as a token of affection, and the ways that cats and humans relate to food are similar in nature to the interactions seen between the human caregiver and the pre-verbal infant. Both cat and human infant are, at least in part, in control of when and what they are fed!"

The researchers established that cats and their owners heavily influence one another, often to the extent that they control each other’s behaviors. Extroverted women with young, active cats seem to be the most in tune with each other. The kitties in these pairings only have to give subtle cues – for example, a single upright movement of the tail – to let their owners know they’re looking for friendly attention.

According to Discovery News, cats also seem to remember human kindness and return the favor later. If an owner fulfills her feline's wish to interact, the cat will often comply with the owner's desire for contact at other times.
 

Mantha Meow

Savannah Super Cat
Thank you thank you thank you @Dantes ! I am so glad I am not the only one. It's so hard when it is your own family that is the worst about it. I have no relationship with my mom and haven't since I was 3. My dad however has always been there along with 2 (soon to be 3) step moms.. The most recent is only 6 years older than me and she along with her 4 year old daughter recently moved in. Needless to say I can not wait until my house is built!!! My dad's cat views have always been "its an animal, whatever" but with the new people in the house he has gotten worse. Sadly I have noticed that when I am in the same room as them and my cats come in if my dad or his fiance even just say "hey go" then the cats take off in terror. It's been really bothering me bc they weren't always like that. With me, my bf, my brother (older lives on his own) they are gems and cuddle bugs. It's such an odd thing. They are only not locked in my room when I am home but even then they choose to stay on my bed right next to me. I feel like they are loosing their spunk due to being kept in only one room and its not a big room.. Luckily we should all be moving in the next few months! I just gotta stick it out until then!!
 

Mantha Meow

Savannah Super Cat
@Pam Flachs My boyfriend and I were just talking about the bigger crate option. The only problem is it would take up pretty much all the free space in my room and then I don't think the potential buyers could adequately see the closet. :( I am going to do some research and figuring out over the next few days for sure though. Between school, having a house built, and worrying about my kitties being locked up I am stressed to the max!!
 

Kristin

Animal Communicator
I am young too, 22...but you aren't crazy. When it comes to the well being of your babies, you are just particular, as am I. I just switched my parrots to an all organic food that I can't purchase in stores because there are no suppliers near me. But the ingredients are amazing, and aren't poisoning my babies.

I also understand abiding by the rules of your parents as I live at home as well. Luckily my mom is great with the animals, and totally gets where I am coming from with them. My dad on the other hand....
Is there a place you can bring your kitties on showing days? Maybe a friend's house? Sibling?

If there is no other option, you can get larger cat carriers that have inserts for food and water. Although not ideal, it is better than nothing.

I hope your house is finished soon, and you can move in and carry on with your kitties happily :)
 

admin

Paige
Staff member
Samantha, thank you for sharing and venting...if any group understand your situation, it is those of us here...let's hope you can get moved ASAP, so your babies will be free!
 

Mantha Meow

Savannah Super Cat
@Kristin unfortunately there isn't anywhere I can take them. The main issue is that showings are at odd times and I have work and school. This is the fourth time it's been shown and the first time it's been so stressful on me with the kitties. Hopefully it sells soon and there's more showings!!
 

Patti

Admin
Staff member
I can certainly understand your frustration and anger over this situation, but I will also reassure you that most cats do not mind being in a nice small, quiet, dark space or any length of time, especially if being out and about will be met with hostility from the humans in the household. I will also mention that people travel with cats all the time in crates for hours to go to cat shows, or new destinations, and they do just fine.

Having said that, I would be much more concerned about the attitude your father and his fiance are projecting toward the cats. IMHO, cats are much more sensitive to their encounters with humans than to having to sleep for a few hours in a crate. If anything is going to effect them it will be their interactions with the humans in the house - no wonder they want to stay in the room with you!

However, I am confident that once you are in your own home and they are in a safe and loving environment, they will revert to the same loving, happy cats you have always known. Cats by nature are forgiving creatures, and rarely (if ever) hold a grudge. So hang in there and be patient - it will soon all be over!
 

Patti

Admin
Staff member
I had/have a similar family problem when I was in my 20s. My mother told me I couldn't bring my cat "home" for the holidays. Our relationship was never the same because when I got there I discovered she had invited my cousin to bring his big dog. Don't get me wrong, I love dogs and even wish I could have one, but the hypocrisy drove me right over the edge....

Doubly so when I told my mom I had bought my Ragdoll Dante from a breeder. Immediately it was "Why did you spend money to buy a cat? Why not get one free* from the shelter?" * shelter cats are never free, but I suppose she doesn't realize this never having adopted a "free" shelter dog herself. She has always had pedigreed dogs. When she met Duma for the first time I brushed her off on "how much he cost" because it's none of her damn business. Notice I don't mention my father because he's much worse than her when it comes to prejudice. He doesn't even consider a cat a valid pet.

Some people are just plain ignorant. Unfortunately if you're living under someone else's roof you have to play by their rules. But when they are under your roof they have to play by yours ;)

Ironically I read the following article this morning (click the link to get the full article): http://healthypets.mercola.com/sites/healthypets/archive/2014/02/05/cat-human-relationship.aspx

Why Your Cat May Be More Human Than You Think

Researchers concluded cats do indeed attach to humans – especially women – as social partners, and not just because they want to keep their food bowls full.

According to a co-author of the 2011 study, researcher Jon Day of the Waltham Centre for Pet Nutrition, in an interview with Discovery News:

"Food is often used as a token of affection, and the ways that cats and humans relate to food are similar in nature to the interactions seen between the human caregiver and the pre-verbal infant. Both cat and human infant are, at least in part, in control of when and what they are fed!"

The researchers established that cats and their owners heavily influence one another, often to the extent that they control each other’s behaviors. Extroverted women with young, active cats seem to be the most in tune with each other. The kitties in these pairings only have to give subtle cues – for example, a single upright movement of the tail – to let their owners know they’re looking for friendly attention.

According to Discovery News, cats also seem to remember human kindness and return the favor later. If an owner fulfills her feline's wish to interact, the cat will often comply with the owner's desire for contact at other times.
Interesting article - I don't agree with all of it, but much of it is spot on!
 
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