Am I scaring my kitten?

[Dantes]

Love the pics. I agree with the rest. My next door neighbor has done what he considers harmless play with his cat, she's just a DSH, but he is quite aggressive with her with his hands. She's about 8 or so now. Neither he nor his wife can cut the cat's nails (I do it for them from time to time but I'm kinda the local cat whisperer lol). The other day his wife got her face too close to the cat, she says she was just going to kiss her or something, and she got whacked in the mouth, really clawed up both inside her mouth and outside in one single swipe. I don't believe the cat meant to do it, she really is a sweet cat and my neighbor (the wife) is also really sweet, but the combination of uncut nails and the not knowing what to expect from the human following the husband's hand play may have led to the reaction. I have to admit that I panic a little bit when he gets near my cats, but I always throw Da Bird in his hands when he's near them so he doesn't have the opportunity to rough-house with them. He does not at all see it as inappropriate and even brags about how he handles them .

I was also curious, you said he was 11 weeks but you've had him for a month already? How old was he when you got him? 7 weeks is kinda young....

 

[MattM]

Love the pics. I agree with the rest. My next door neighbor has done what he considers harmless play with his cat, she's just a DSH, but he is quite aggressive with her with his hands. She's about 8 or so now. Neither he nor his wife can cut the cat's nails (I do it for them from time to time but I'm kinda the local cat whisperer lol). The other day his wife got her face too close to the cat, she says she was just going to kiss her or something, and she got whacked in the mouth, really clawed up both inside her mouth and outside in one single swipe. I don't believe the cat meant to do it, she really is a sweet cat and my neighbor (the wife) is also really sweet, but the combination of uncut nails and the not knowing what to expect from the human following the husband's hand play may have led to the reaction. I have to admit that I panic a little bit when he gets near my cats, but I always throw Da Bird in his hands when he's near them so he doesn't have the opportunity to rough-house with them. He does not at all see it as inappropriate and even brags about how he handles them .

I was also curious, you said he was 11 weeks but you've had him for a month already? How old was he when you got him? 7 weeks is kinda young....

I also agree with the rest, which most have expressed good points and information without telling me that I am raising a monster. Since, I have made sure to always have a toy in my hand when playing with him. Eight weeks old was when I brought him home. Thank you for your concern and feedback, but I have already been well informed to when the optimal time is to bring a kitten home from the breeder. Sorry I was not exact in my language when using the word "month". I probably should have said, "a month and a week."

Why are you letting your cat near other cats that you consider aggressive if you know your neighbor is playing with them inappropriately? That's seems to be a very strange thing for your neighbor to be braging about.

 

[Dantes]

I also agree with the rest, which most have expressed good points and information without telling me that I am raising a monster. Since, I have made sure to always have a toy in my hand when playing with him. Eight weeks old was when I brought him home. Thank you for your concern and feedback, but I have already been well informed to when the optimal time is to bring a kitten home from the breeder. Sorry I was not exact in my language when using the word "month". I probably should have said, "a month and a week."

Why are you letting your cat near other cats that you consider aggressive if you know your neighbor is playing with them inappropriately? That's seems to be a very strange thing for your neighbor to be braging about.

Clearly you misunderstood my post, as well as my intention.

I told you my neighbor raised a sweet cat who gets confused and acts like a monster on rare occasions, when she is confused by the humans in her life. The cat is very sweet though. The example I gave is that I am able to cut her nails whereas my neighbor can't.

8 weeks is too young, it's good you know that now, there's nothing to do in retrospect, I've been there too and my cat (Ragdoll) I believe (but no proof) has behavioral problems as a result. I was asking out of concern, not out of blame. Since you now know, you also know that cats learn a lot from their siblings and mothers at the 8-12 week stage, and without that interaction they might not know how to handle their claws or teeth carefully. It might not even be your problem, IDK, I was just asking. No other point was intended, certainly no blame, as I was guilty once too.

Generally my cats don't go near my neighbor's cats, but my neighbor does come to my house from time to time as we are friends. When my neighbors come to my house, they interact with my cats, since we all love cats. He has in the past tried to rough-house with my cats but Da Bird stopped this human behavior (trying to be funny here, as in "I rehabilitate cats and TRAIN people" a la dog whisperer).

The cats do go near each other from time to time, but it is not often. They are fine when they are all together, which again, is not often. Mine are usually on leashes, and sometimes they are separated by a fence. My neighbor's cats are both sweet cats, but they are confused how to act around humans, which is the whole point of my relating you my story.

I could have added to the story that I consider both of my neighbors to be family. My neighbor's wife has stage 4 breast cancer and was going through her I think 4th round of chemo at the time so the issue was very bad for her in that moment to be scratched on the gum by a cat. The cat was NOT at fault. She just got confused. My neighbor's wife does not blame the cat, nor do I. She is still happy with her cat, but she constantly reminds herself to be careful around her now.

Hope this clears up your confusion and misunderstanding. My aim was to help by use of anecdote and example, not to blame.

 

[Anatole Cannon]

I agree with everyone else that he is playing with you like you are another cat. I also agree about stopping the rough behaviour. There is a very good reason you are told not to do it, and you are starting to see the beginnings of it. You can redirect that stalking behaviour onto a toy.

 

[John Popp]

I had some similar rough times with our boy trying to define the limits of play. He Definitely played with me as if I was his sibling and although trying to avoid hand play, they were amongst his targets. Somewhere along the way came some 4 paw face pounces and I really needed to step up my efforts. Time outs weren't fairing so well, and finally I would just have to remove myself from him.

He was definitely trying to push some boundaries with me, and it was a good couple months before his behavior was curbed enough that I didn't have worries about when he would reach adulthood. I think it's always important to step back and think about the games you play now would translate to that of a 15 or 20lb cat. For me that moment of clarity came with a kitten wrapped around my face and not afraid to admit it, but I was a little scared.

Time outs, crated, placed in the carrier or finding himself alone in a large room along with a few scruffs, OK a lot of them, were the answer. He still pushes the rules of engagement from time to time, most notably wrapping himself around an ankle, but he is long gone before you can muster the word "hey". So your acknowledgment that this can lead to future problems is half the battle and I'm sure you'll get things under control.