Questions about new kitten.

[Brandy DW]

I assure you I do take things slow-ish. One thing I've learned about cats is there going to do what they want to do and if you try to force them to do the opposite, such as holding on them when they really want down it's just going to 1) make them annoyed and maybe scratch you or 2) Make it so the next time they'll want to be held even less and 3) If kept at it maybe make it so that she'll be afraid of me or something. So i don't force the issue. Yes I do pick her up some now and pet her while she enjoys it, I do try to prolong it a little to see I can get the squirming to stop but I do put her down pretty fast when she wants down. Except for when I'm carrying her upstairs or downstairs because then I don't have a choice but I do try to get from point a to point b fairly fast so she doesn't have to carried longer than necessary...

 

[Brigitte Cowell]

Well I'm trying and yes I know they have different personalities and that she won't be like Neka was and I don't want to change her actual personality because she is who she is. However I was hoping that there would be some way to get her to like being carried at least or at least not to thrash about when being carried...

I think that this is part and parcel of choosing a high energy cat breed.... they have too much energy to be held still for any length of time!

What you can do is work on not holding her for long, just pick up for a second then lent back down again...over time you can extend that time. I don't think you can make a cat "like" it but you can encourage them to tolerate it

 

[Brandy DW]

Okay I'll try that too... So far the scruff thing hasn't worked, she doesn't really like having her scruff held unless I'm doing it wrong.. I don't usually scruff them... Neka let me carry her like a baby on her back, she seemed quite content being held and carried like that and never really put up a fuss unless I wanted her to sit on my lap sitting down. But as I could sleep with her I didn't really mind that she didn't like sitting on my lap much. I'm hoping as Sabriel gets older she'll settle down slightly to where I can sleep in the same room as her without her keeping me awake the whole night..

 

[Brigitte Cowell]

Every kitten is different even when siblings of the same litter, in my experience. There are ones that yes can be carried like babies but this is really unusual in a cat as cats generally like to have their legs under them.

I find with the kittens we raise here, that they go through a "training period" where they will wake in the wee hours and think "playtime" and think it okay to play on my head. So I have to just get up and put them out of the bedroom and close the door. Even if they cry outside the room I have to just have a few disturbed nights of sleep until they realize that if they wish to play they leave the bed and then have the freedom to come back to cuddle later. They are a smart breed of cat, so they work out the rules quickly enough as long as you are firm and consistent with them...good luck!

 

[Dantes]

When Duma was smaller, I could hold him no problem, but then after he was fixed, something changed and he stopped letting me hold him. He didn't even like being picked up.

I let him have his way about this for a while, but now I've started something new. I pick him up when I want to, and hold him until I notice signals of him getting restless. Once he does that I slowly start to put him down. If he starts struggling though, I sort of "freeze" and hold him a bit tighter in the same spot, without either putting him down or picking him back up. I say to him calmly, if you relax, I'll put you down. It seems to calm him most times, and then I'll slowly let his feet touch the ground.

I think this has helped a lot. When I started doing this (he was probably about 8-9 months), I could barely hold him for a few seconds when I was able to hold him at all. Now I can hold him for a couple of minutes (he's almost 11 months), and he doesn't struggle. I think it's because the minute he signals, I start to slowly lower him down, and he knows that as long as he doesn't get crazy, I'll let him go.

Now that I wrote this out, I'm not sure if it makes sense, but it seems to be working. Maybe it'll help someone else?

 

[Brigitte Cowell]

Definitely there is an age when they can seemingly be "teenagers" and they can sometimes start refusing to be held. We had an F1 like that, at ~9-10 months of age she decided she didn't want to be held. So for five timed minutes each day, both my husband and I would sit and hold her. Calmly, soothingly but firmly and persistently. I felt it important that she know she didn't get to decide. And she is fine now being held at over 7 years of age... she will gripe and whine of course but allow it. I don't tend to hold my cats for more than a minute or two normally but it is good to be able to do so!

I see that as different to a very small kitten that is squiggly and impatient and new to a house though... the motivation is different. And for a very young kitten, I suspect it might damage the relationship you are building with the new kitten to try to make them be held for anything more than a few seconds.

 

[shelby]

Just like you are paranoid about something happening to him...he is paranoid about you......the strange person that wants that wants to carry him around;>) He is not quite ready to trust you and feels like he is being restrained when you have him in your arms. Give him time..holding him in one place and gradually move around with him until he starts to relax while being held. If you feel kim start to temse up...put him down immediately. After a bit,,I think he will like being held. Time is the answer;>)
www.dreamweavercatz.com

 

[Dantes]

Definitely there is an age when they can seemingly be "teenagers" and they can sometimes start refusing to be held. We had an F1 like that, at ~9-10 months of age she decided she didn't want to be held.

Sorry to go off topic, but at the same time, I'm glad to hear that it's not abnormal. I went through doubts like maybe I got him neutered too early, too late, maybe I did something to him, maybe he got Dante-disease, etc etc. I hope he snaps out of it soon. He still sleeps with me though not in my armpit any more, and occasionally asks for my lap, but he is much more reserved than he was pre-neuter. :/ Working on it. He is still a lot of fun and is getting even better at leash walking.

 

[Brandy DW]

Well I can say that tonight is the first night that she jumped into my lap and then up to my face for nuzzles and kitty kisses/licks with absolutely no prompting from me. Usually I call her name or pat the couch or my lap or something but tonight she was just very affectionate! =)

New thing to figure out though, today I tried for the first time to trim her claw... that really didn't go over to well so I'll try again tomorrow...

 

[Patti]

If she isn't used to having her nails trimmed you might want to try handle her paws several times a day, manipulate the toes to expose the nails without trimming them. Once she's used to you handling the feet it should be easier (not necessarily easy) to trim her nails.