Zeddie is being a butt

[Kristin]

It's been awhile since I posted...it's been a busy few months and there have been a lot of changes in my family. This is going to be a lengthy post, so hang in there.

My sister moved home from Ottawa, and with her came Thor (who some of you may remember as the itty bitty kitty I fostered a few years ago)

Zeddie and Thor got along brilliantly when he was a kitten...but not so much anymore. About a year and a half ago, Thor came home for Christmas and Zeddie and he got along brilliantly again. Well...Thor mounted Zeddie and lightly nipped the back of her neck and she lost her mind. She hasn't forgiven him since, and now that he's home permanently he is confined to a room while we try to work out how to create peace in the house again.

This is what we've done so far:

Thor (and Tori) moved home in May. We did a full 3 weeks of complete quarantine. After 3 weeks, we put up baby gates and allowed Zeddie to see Thor, but he was safe and sound in the room. She did well with this. Jimmy has been 100% great with Thor (but Thor has done the mounting thing with Jimmy as well. Jimmy is just more tolerant)

After a few weeks of the partition, Thor would come out of the room while supervised. Zeddie was fine with him, as long as he didn't move. This process took hours as I would have to sit there with them, watching them 100% until Thor came out of his own free will. He would find a place to sit. Everyone got treats upon positive interactions. This worked well for quite some time, but the problem was it was inconsistent. I was preparing for an exam, and couldn't spend hours watching them.

After a bit, things stopped progressing. If Thor walked around, Zeddie would lose it. It became too much for me to supervise by myself, so the introductions just stopped. I think this is a huge part of where things fell apart.

A few weeks ago, we decided to try getting Thor downstairs, and acclimate them both to him being around the house. Zeddie went on her leash and harness, and was treated for positive interactions with Thor, who sat in my arms. If I put him down, he would run and hide, which would trigger Zeddie. She only gets treated for positive interactions, however we have a very busy household and the men wandering around scared Thor further, which triggered Zeddie further. These interactions are dependant on two people, so they were not consistent either.

Tori (my sister) began letting Thor out in the mornings, when Zeddie is still locked in my room. She puts Thor away when we get out, but she can hear him moving around. This seemed to be fine, although I wouldn't say it helped her accept him at all. This weekend I went away, and Zeddie and Jimmy stayed with their aunties. Thor was out all weekend and when we got home, Zeddie lost it. Thor was put away, but his smell was all over the house and she attacked Jimmy, thinking he was Thor. I calmed her down and brought her to my room for a few hours while Jimmy was allowed around the house. When we came out, she was fine.

Yesterday we tried again, with Zeddie on her leash and Thor's door opened. She immediately lost it, without even seeing him. She was treated for positive reactions and that calmed her down. It seemed to be going okay, but Thor had to be held again as he would otherwise hide and be impossible to grab again, making it hard for her to see him. Throughout this interaction, though, she would confuse Jimmy for Thor and freak out. She would calm down when she realized it was Jimmy, but she would have the same reaction when she saw Tiger. We tried having her smell Thor, and she lost it again. After that, she tried to attack Jimmy again, so she went on a time out while he was out, and when she came out again, she was fine.

This morning, Thor wasn't even out at all and she thought Jimmy was Thor. I had to pick him up and get his smell all over my hands, and shove them up her nose for her to calm down.

I commend anyone for getting this far. I would love to hear some suggestions.
In the past Zeddie has been iffy on Feliway, however I will try the diffusers. My herbs don't cut it. I got a custom made Bach remedy for her, but she won't let me apply it.
I know many of you are a fan of Marilyn Krieger, but after paying my way through school I can't afford a consult.

No one is in any danger of being rehomed and I will absolutely not resort to drugs at any point.
Thanks for any help you have!

 

[Patti]

I think you need to take some steps back and start over again. Put up the baby gates so that they can see each other but stay safe on either side of the doorway. I would do this for a few weeks, or longer if needed. Try playing (with your sister) with both cats at the same time with wand toys on each side of the gate a couple of times a day. Exchange bedding between Zeddie and Thor every few days. Obviously continue to treats for good behavior. Zeddie's attacks on Jimmie is called redirected aggression and not uncommon in cats.

I'm not sure exactly what is involved in 'applying' the Bach remedy, but if you can manage it, try putting.a drop of vanilla extract on Zeddie's nose. I don't know what you can afford at this point in time, but you might want to consider purchasing Cat vs. Cat by Pam Johnson-Bennett.
It's unfortunate you won't consider medication because it may be the only thing that can help Zeddie.

 

[Kristin]

I hadn't thought of a drop of vanilla, I will definitely try that. Thor and my sister are going away for the weekend as well, so she can snoop through his things but I don't want her to feel any claim over his room.

I'm trying a new approach with the Bach remedy as well. I'll check out the book too

I forgot to say I did go back to the door thing, but Zeddie jumped the gate and got in -_- She isn't hurting him, and she listened to me when I told her to stop. We also did the toy thing, which Zeddie loved but Thor was scared to leave the bed. I think that had to do with the inconsistency though.

 

[Kristin]

It has been a long time since I've been on here, but I thought I would update this thread in case anyone else finds themselves in a similar position.

Since I last posted, Zeddie and Thor have been kept completely separate. Thor comes out when Zeddie isn't home/when we go to bed. Zeddie was redirecting at Jimmy, and although I tried various smell masking ideas, bach remedies, herbs, reiki, animal communication, exercise, slow introductions...nothing was working.

I found a local cat behaviourist at a pet show, named Patti Welch. She came for a consultation just over a week ago, and had a terrific understanding of Zeddie and how this behaviour escalated so far.

She told me to play with Thor and Jimmy using pipe cleaners (and hide them unsupervised, of course) ,and then play with Zeddie using the same pipe cleaner, to incorporate his smell into play.

She recognized that Zeddie is very high energy and intelligent, and said that puzzle toys would be a good idea. I had thought of this before, but found Zeddie would figure them out quickly and get bored. I got her a tricky treat ball anyways, and it turned out to work brilliantly. I now put the tricky treat ball in front of my door when we go to bed, so when she gets up in the morning she is distracted by food, and forgets to get upset about Thor having been out when she was in. It takes her about half an hour to get through the tricky treat ball, and when she is done, she forgets about Thor completely.

She also said that when Zeddie goes to the door in an inappropriate manner, to call her away and give her a treat for listening and being calm.

I have increased her exercise as well, so she gets out multiple times a week for several hours each time.

Although it has only been a little over a week, I have seen huge improvements in Zeddie's behaviour. She is far less fixated on the door to Thor's room, she has stopped trying to sneak her way in, she is more responsive when called away, she hasn't gone into a 'red rage' (due mostly to the tricky treat ball), she hasn't redirected at Jimmy.

For the first time ever, she has allowed another cat to sit on the top of 'her' cat tree. This is a huge step for her...the cat tree has always been her's, and since it is 7 ft tall, she has always been a big brat on it since no one can reach her. Yesterday, she let Jimmy go on the very top while she slept on a lower platform. When she woke up, she went and snuggled with him on the top. This has never happened before. She has always shoved other cats off the top.

Her behaviourist says that we will probably get them to a point where they can be together supervised, however it is unlikely they will ever be friends. I am thrilled with the progress Zeddie has made in just a week, and am hopeful that they will be able to be around the house together.

My advice to others going through this is to bite the bullet and get a behaviourist. I really liked Patti as she understood Zeddie and was very intuitive with the situation, and didn't place blame anywhere. I also liked that she was able to come to my house and see exactly what was going on. If you're in the Niagara/St Catharine's/ Hamilton area in Ontario, I highly recommend her.

 

[Patti]

That is fantastic news! I'm so glad to hear that Zeddie is responding to the recommendations of the animal behaviorist!