More to pile onto the squirrel thread. Trish and I discovered that squirrels might be getting into the larger roof over our side porch. It's a flat roof, so when we heard scurrying around, we thought that the squirrels were on top of the roof. Well, that turned out not to to be the case and we had to find a no-kill pest control guy to get rid of them.
The pest control guy comes over, and he's a straight up comic book hero. I told him he could assuredly increase his business if he changed the name from AAAAA1 Pest Control to "Squirrel Please!". He sets up the have-a-heart trap and about 8 hours later we have our first squirrel. One at dawn and one at dusk for 2 days. Day 3 comes along and the real fun starts.
Day three and we have the pest control guy over to evict the latest trapped squirrel. However this time it's a young one, about twice the size of a chipmunk. I see a baby squirrel in the trap, we call the guy to bust him out and he's supposed to show up within an hour. I head back inside on what's a pretty dreary day waiting for him to show up.
Next thing I know both cats are at the front door jumping up and pounding on the glass and I hear noises that don't seem like they should be coming from a baby squirrel.
Herd the cats, get them away from the door, go out on the porch and there's a big ass red tail hawk trying to get at the baby squirrel.
I start yelling at the Hawk, and he's like "you're not getting my lunch dude".
I finally shoo him away and he's giving me the mojo from 20 yards away on the branch of a big oak tree.
It's drizzling a bit and rather cool so I want to find a quick remedy. I walk back under the tree, and start flapping my wings so he can see how big I was, hoping this would scare him away.
After several minutes of acting like an idiot, and now the neighbors taking note, the hawk was not impressed and found my odd display of girth totally unremarkable.
Meanwhile baby squirrel is making all kinds of noise, Mom, Dad and baby brother are all spun up chanting "Attica, Attica, Attica" while deciding if they want to rip my face off. I examine the baby squirrel to see if he was injured at all and he made sure to unleash his bladder by peeing on me. The squirrel was fine, and I was now pee'd in to be part of their posse.
Mr Hawk then swoops down, not sure whether his aim is the other members of the squirrel family or the one held captive. I start doing my I'm a big bird too dance, and Mr Hawk pulls up and lands on the chimney.
Enter Trish, and now the Momma instincts are pegged and I need to make certain that nothing happens to the baby squirrel.
At this point I get a towel to cover up baby squirrel in the trap, so perhaps he'll shut up and quit advertising he's on the dinner menu.
Mr Hawk continues to sit on the chimney, staring intently at the towel covered squirrel trap.
He is clearly not going anywhere.
So now with my sense of urgency piqued and Trish wanting "that dumb ole hawk" to fly elsewhere, I get the hose to try and spray him away.
Mr Hawk welcomes the water, shakes it off as if I were giving him a shower and finally starts opening his mouth to take a drink. I'm left shaking my head in wonderment, and if someone were ever to tell me that you could get close enough to a hawk to give them a drink with a hose, I would roll my eyes and ask them "who killed Kennedy?".
The "Squirrel Please" guy shows up, the baby squirrel gets released and a finally dejected hawk makes his way elsewhere.
Back inside, our two boys were in total awe of my great command of nature. It's a great thing, that no matter how silly or inept you may be, your cats always think your the greatest.